Image by Matt Willis Photography.
Planning a wedding should be fun and romantic but statistically it’s rated seven in the top ten most stressful life events. So it’s no surprise that many couples find planning their day tough.
Stresses can come from keeping family happy, managing a budget, supplier liason, signing contracts, doing wedmin and making big decisions. Whilst also often managing a big project at work, moving house and trying to find balance between doing it all.
At this point in the blog, I should probably also reference the elephant in the room. If planning wasn’t stressful enough, the world has also been hit by the coronavirus. Meaning even more uncertainty when it comes to your wedding, the economy and how we live our lives.
Finding balance in a world of noise can be tough, but here are some tips to help you find your zen when planning your dream day.
Remember WHY you are getting married
Put aside all the worries and the work load when it comes to planning your day and remember why you are getting married.
Of course the beautiful venue, impeccable food, cute his and her’s cocktails and the perfect colour scheme are important. But you are getting hitched because your love each other, you want to shout it from the roof tops and celebrate with your loved ones. Make sure that that feeling is at the center of everything you do.
Smart, daily self-care
Couples are often juggling more than just planning a wedding, perhaps it’s relocating or reaching for their dream job which means that they are busy and tired. In time of stress and overwhelm self-care should be a key focus.
For many self-care is about spa trips, getting your nails done or a massage which feels like a luxury. But for me it’s all about daily, considered action that impacts your day, lifts you up and gives you the energy and focus to keep going. This is all the more important now that our worlds have become just that bit smaller.
Use small windows of opportunity to create little rituals to make yourself feel better and more balanced. Try a breathing exercise when the kettle’s boiling (long inhale, hold and long exhale until the water is ready) or drink an extra glass of water when you waiting for a meeting to start. Journal your thoughts on your commute or even sit in the sunshine for five minutes when you waiting for your next call.
These tiny actions all add up and create balance in your day, give you energy and allow you to pause your busy brain.
Reconnect with your happy
When we are busy, often the first things to fall off the list is meeting up with friends, doing a hobby we love or having a day trip.
When it comes to balance and energy, happiness is vital. We often wait for it to fall into our laps, to magically find it but life gets in the way. So make plans to meet friends (although right now opt for a Skype or Google hangout!), pick up your old painting kit or head to the seaside for some air. Spending time with people who make us smile or laugh so hard until we cry is a great way to catch your breath and create balance.
Make it as easy as possible
In coaching we call this ‘setting ourselves up for success’ but in basic terms it’s about planning to make daily tweaks as easy as possible. Perhaps you want to journal each day with a cup of coffee before your morning starts. Why not pick your clothes the night before and lay them out, set a slightly earlier alarm and you’ll be up, dressed and writing before you know it!
Or it could be that you miss an old friend who is so funny and you always feel amazing when you are together. Make the time to reach out.
Finally, be kind to yourself and others around you. Allow yourself time to rest and recharge, I often say ‘slow down to speed up’. Which when you are busy makes no sense and feels uncomfortable. But by slowing down, taking a break and allowing a little pause you can reflect on what’s really important and what is the best next step. And if there was ever a moment to take a pause, it’s now.
Your wedding should be about love and laughter and marrying your true love. Remember this always and you’ll find balance in your planning.